The Dreaded Mother’s Day Card Purchase

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Yesterday someone asked me for guidance on the “dreaded mother’s day card purchase”. Flashbacks of trying to find just the right card went zipping through my mind. I remember reading dozens of them trying to find something that my Mother would like, but that didn’t make me feel like a liar. I wanted to make her happy and I wanted approval but I also wanted to feel good about myself. Joke cards were fun, but my mother didn’t appreciate them at all. Mushy cards that said “thank you for being the most wonderful mother in the world… for always taking care of all my needs, for putting yourself last” and all that other stuff wasn’t truthful. Not getting a card was even more risky than buying a less than perfect card. Thinking about that whole dreaded mother’s day card shopping nightmare resulted in the following thoughts;

This week in honor of Mother’s day, don’t forget to acknowledge the Mother that YOU have been to yourself. I am talking about everyone who has survived any kind of family dysfunction, emotional neglect or psychological abuse. I am talking to everyone who lived in a violent home, and to everyone who was spiritually abused and told that even God is disappointed in you. I am reaching out to every human being who was taught to believe that they were less valuable than any other human being and to anyone who felt shame that was not theirs to bear, and to every individual who came to the conclusion that if actions speak louder than words, my mother didn’t love me. I am referring to everyone, man or woman, who has persisted in moving forward in spite of the baggage and false beliefs left over from child abuse that we have tried and tried to ditch although this has always been so much easier said than done.

I remember feeling horrified and even panicky at the point in my process of emotional healing when I realized that I was going to have to be the one that had to do the work of healing myself. I was going to have to learn to validate myself the way that I had not been validated by others. And I was so tired already. It just didn’t seem fair. In some ways I felt like I was being asked to take care of yet ONE MORE person when I wanted to scream “WHO is going to take care of me for once? When is it going to be MY turn!!!?”

One of the first things I learned in my recovery process is that it wasn’t my fault that I arrived where I arrived as an adult in such a state of pain, depression and overwhelm. I didn’t BREAK me in the first place. I wasn’t born broken. I didn’t do any of this to myself and I was tired of being the one that had to take care of everyone else and all their feelings. I felt like I had been struggling to survive the shipwreck that was my childhood my whole life, a child taking care of a child and now I had to learn to re-parent the lost child that was me in order to take my rightful place in the world as an adult. It seemed like an impossible task. I didn’t think there was enough energy in the world that I could access in order to accomplish what I have since accomplished.

So this week when someone asked me for guidance on the “dreaded mother’s day card purchase” my first reaction was “Oh ya ~ I can totally relate to what you are talking about!” My second reaction and the one that I replied with was; “I sure don’t miss those days!”  

My third reaction is this: Before you decide what you are going to do for your Mother of origin, consider acknowledging yourself.

Buy yourself a mother’s day card. Acknowledge yourself for everything you have done to take care of yourself in spite of adversity, neglect, abuse, fear and terror. Make yourself a special lunch or take yourself out to your favorite place. Buy yourself flowers and write the card to yourself. Treat yourself like a King or a Queen in gratitude for all the times that you have picked yourself up, for all the times that you have suffered in silence, for all the times that you took the blame and for all the times that you cried alone ~ thank yourself. Love yourself.  You deserve to be loved and you especially deserve your own love.

Although I am sure that a higher power was behind my recovery, pulling for me, gently urging me, whispering to me that I could do this and softly encouraging me to get on the right path to overcoming abuse, I was the one that had to listen to that urging and do the work. I was the one that found the courage to face those terrors. I was the one that decided to unpack that baggage and take a look at what was weighing me down. I was the one that tackled it. I was the one that had to learn what a boundary was, how to set them and why I had a right to have them. I had to face my fears of standing up for myself when deep down I believed that I had NO rights, that I didn’t deserve and the fear that I really was unworthy because that is what I had been taught by the abusive, neglectful and dismissive actions of others.

And I did it ~ I learned to validate myself in all the places that I had been invalidated and I continue to do it. I am learning to be a loving parent to myself; the loving parent that I’ve always wanted. I am celebrating that I am a person with value and with needs and that my needs are not something to be rejected and dismissed. My needs are not bad or wrong. My needs are not selfish. I can take care of my needs and be proud of myself for it. Every human being has needs. I am celebrating my humanness this Mother’s Day. I am celebrating letting go of tons of false self-judgment and embracing the truth about me. I am worthy, deserving and lovable. I am lovely and loving. I am the person that I was born to be and I did the hard work to get here.

Over 22 years ago I became a mother to my first born child. Several years ago I decided to become the mother I never had to my neglected self and both these events are worthy of celebration.

This year I am grateful that all three of my kids will be home for Mother’s day. I feel really blessed that I have beautiful, intentional and co-creative relationships with all three of them. I am celebrating the mother that I am and the children that I have raised.

And this year I am also going to take a few minutes to acknowledge the Loving Mom that I have become to the lost little girl that I was and celebrate the mother that I have been and have become to me in my own life. Please consider sharing with me and with all the readers here how you might do the same for yourself.

Happy Mother’s Day to each of us. (including the Men!)

There is freedom on the other side of broken;

Darlene Ouimet

The Emerging from Broken book is ready for download! If you find that the subject matter I am writing about resonates with you, get this book today! This 197 page, downloadable, printable, live linked e-book will put you on the fast track to healing.  Get yours here through the upper right side bar or click this link~ Emerging from Broken The Beginning of Hope for Emotional Healing

198 response to "The Dreaded Mother’s Day Card Purchase"

  1. By: Kiki Posted: 24th April 2018

    When the women that SHOULD be the closest person in your life doesn’t know how to love and doesn’t even LIKE you enough to spend ANY time in childhood to teach and rear as she should…that unavailability creates deeply maladjusted adults forever reacting defensively towards others – and who are ALWAYS working to figure out how to behave “normally.” Abused/neglected children/now adults routinely trip, fall down, then figure out, react to and finally get back up…HUNDREDS of situations hundreds of times…Every Day. It is simply EXHAUSTING emotionally, mentally, physically to work from damaged beginnings. These malformed individuals take their toll on society as well as friends and family and of course, themselves. Highly sensitive, we isolate and come out of our shells to test the water occasionally. Then, unsurprisingly, become wounded again and go back into hiding until strength returns.

    It is a lot of society to ask us to thank someone that created such never-ending heart breaking self-awareness. We would much rather not. However, I can send my mother a card once a year because she is a believer and I annually send a heartfelt Thank You, for introducing me to the reason I am still alive. Jesus Christ. Find your higher power. Faith and hope can be found in God. In our weaknes, He is strong. Hugs and heartfelt prayers to all of us looking for rest.

  2. By: Tundra Woman Posted: 19th March 2018

    Tilly? You’re never obligated to honor the dishonorable on this, the Highest of Holy Days (or on any day) which shitty Muggers expropriate entirely for their own self-aggrandizement. Real moms know and deeply appreciate what a great honor it truly is for their adult children to acknowledge them at all, period, for simply DOING THEIR DAMN JOB. Being a mother involves far more than spreading your legs (for who ever) and giving birth. However, it is NOT an imperative you participate in this farce at all. Where are we commanded to honor mothers who are evil-by dictionary definition, malevolent? We’re not. Only Tyrants DEMAND you pay tribute where none is due. It is the most abusive of mothers who demand you betray YOURSELF yet again by paying homage to their self-appointed High Holiness.

    Please think about this: When you struggle finding a card and or a gift that will pass the Tyranical Mugger sniff test yet knowing full well it won’t, you are denying your Reality. You are complicit in denying your very humanity, your lived experience-and repudiating your own agency to assess her behavior accurately and make your decisions accordingly. By your own report based on decades of experience with this Predator/Parasite, no matter what you do it will not please her High Holiness, right? Can we please sttaappp with this perversion, this hijacking of a Hallmark holiday as a transparent excuse for bending your knees in worship for nasty, abusive, neglectful, Muggers? It makes a mockery of the real moms who know the day they gave birth to this most perfect of little beings, this miracle of a unique human, they committed themselves to supporting and encouraging that helpless little baby to mature into a fully independent person in their OWN RIGHT, not as a prop to fulfill mommy or daddy’s fantasies nor to be an extension of the parent or a scapegoat/whipping post for their own gratification. And yes, these kinds of parents not only maltreat their children and adult children reflexively as a reflection of their own bankrupt Character, but they KNOW and take sadistic pleasure in denying you that elusive elixer of their approval. It is in this kind of anticipated occassion which very clearly demonstrates the unmistakable pattern of their capacity and agency for premeditated, targeted and intentionally hurtful behavior. If that isn’t evil/malevolent, I dunno what is.

    You are entirely correct: “It is too much pressure” to live a lie. It is “too much pressure” to offer yourself up for continuing debasement. It is “too much pressure” to collude in gaslighting yourself. It is “too much pressure” to be willfully robbed of your very humanity.

    There’s an expression that goes something like, “If you think you’re suffering from anxiety/depression/dysthymia etc. check first to see if you’re surrounded by assholes.”
    You are-and an evil one at that.

    When the demands of Mothers Day translate into a pounding heart, a horrible sense of anxiety and foreboding etc., your body is telling you to take steps to protect yourself from a known threat. You may not be able to articulate exactly what makes her a threat, but your CNS and Endocrine Systems are screaming “Run!” Your most fundamental right is the right to self-defense. Even an amoeba, a single called organism “knows” to stay away from pointy stuff in it’s environment. A slime mold which has no brain or CNS “knows” to avoid a salt pile. Tilly, if these organisms are acting on the premise of self-preservation through innate self-defense mechanisms, why would you as a living being be denied the same?
    Turn off the phone. Think about what YOU would like to do on that day-and DO IT. You will not spontaneously combust nor will a bolt of lightning strike you down for exercising your most fundamental right as a human being.
    It will herald the beginning of your life lived in Truth and Personal Integrity, refusing to bow to the oversized toddler tantrums courtesy of that morally and ethically repugnant pox on humanity, the one who dares to call herself a “mother” when she has consistently behaved as anything BUT one.
    G’on, now. You can do this, Tilly.

  3. By: Tilly Posted: 10th March 2018

    I loathe Mother’s Day. As a child it was a day where I tried (and failed) to buy my mother’s love. As an adult it has been a day where I feel coerced into spending time with and praising (with gifts & fancy dinners) a woman who I don’t believe deserves it. And she’s not even grateful! She is hell on earth if she doesn’t get what she expects but when she does, it’s never enough. It’s always been a day where the lie of our relationship is put under a microscope and, even when we are getting on as best we can, it’s too much pressure. This has only been exacerbated by my infertility, because I don’t get to be part of the club from either side. I have just spend quite a few hours trying to choose a card and I am really struggling. The cards are a lie for me, but other people really do feel these wonderful sentiments for their mother’s – why do they get that and I don’t?! So thank you for your blog post, because now I know there are others out there, and because it was everything I needed to hear right now.

  4. By: Carlos Posted: 3rd February 2016

    I almost broke the tradition of giving Happy Birthday and Happy Father’s Day cards to the one and only, but the Jiminy Cricket in me decided to conjure up potential scenarios as to how my father would react if ever I did stop. Images of him crying, looking shocked and what not all played up inside of me that I decided to take the bait and once again be reeled into the never ending bullshit (Carlos, Carlos I tell myself. You are starting to become like one of those goody goody protagonists in Filipino drama, who have decided to just cover up the shit with stars and stripes and rainbow unicorns. Like when will you learn?) So here I am after my blunder, still trying to conjure up a message to write within those cards that actually sound decent, which makes essay writing look like child’s play (Kidding damn you Harvard author date and critical analysis). I am really only lying to myself when I write “I love you” and I really want to break that cycle this year with no guilt whatsoever. As it is really no longer the case of thanking him for all the good whenever I write to him. The essence of which I wanted to project through those countless messages was really: “I love you, but I know that in my heart that I do need to protect myself from you.” If that makes any sense.

    I fear being a father every single day I’ll be happy if I get the chance, but also thankful if not. I’ve read stories of grandparents filing for custody and winning and furthermore I’ve also read or seen stories on TV where no matter how good the parent is, the child still ends up turning bad anyway (Which is probably what the abusers meant when they told their own children, that what goes around, comes around). A drama filled life from the current generation is not one that a parent should ever give to children.

    As I’ve decided to see through the bullshit and hate on my father, I am afraid that this will all now come back to me when it’s my turn. What if my child or children complains about me in a forum one day? What if they hate me to? I’ve tried to convince myself that it’ll be okay, by saying that I will never be like their grandfather but it’s
    scary. I guess it’s just not for me. Maybe one day (Although I’d probably just adopt as that would limit toxic behavior to carry on for further generations, I don’t know). But for now I will take that piece of the article and work on that, which is to be a parent to myself. Rebuild myself to be that person I always was but was only clouded by darkness in the form of toxic voices and actions that are clearly no longer being entertained anymore.

  5. By: Kylie Posted: 4th May 2015

    Hi Light, I’m convinced l will go NC. Yet lm starting to feel inclined to at least send a brief text msg wishing her a happy MD. it’s a dilemma. Not real sure she deserves it, do l really want to feel crappy or at least feel remorseful if l don’t? Then l think of my own children as l am a mother myself. How would l feel if they did this to me? Considering l do have a good relationship with all my children, l don’t expect this to be an issue. Although they are still quite young (9,11,16). I was already out of home by 16 and living in foster care, so l must be doing something right? My children were all wanted and are my own biological children.
    I’ve mentioned in posts here before that l thought my situation was unique as us kids were all adopted. I’ve come to realise that family dysfunction happens a lot in biological families, that it’s not unique to adoption. I’m thinking that must be so much worse in biological families. With adoption it seems almost a given, as you are not biologically related as cannot love someone else’s child/children as you would your own.

    Darlene, l think you are right, if relatives didn’t ask me, then they didn’t want to know the truth. I guess my mother won in succeeding at tearing me apart and making me the PROBLEM child without looking at what she did and how she contributed to the dysfunction. I often wonder in the wee early hours of the morning or in quite moments, if she ever reflects on her self? I wonder ‘does she hurt like me – ever?’

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 4th May 2015

      Hi everyone
      Tomorrow ( may 5th) I will be publishing a new Mother’s Day post and I think this new one will provide some great food for thought.

      I will also be launching a contest where someone will win an hour on the phone with me for a free consult or conversation!

      Hugs Darlene

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 5th May 2015

      Hi Kylie
      Getting the child to see themselves as ‘the problem’ is how the grooming process works in emotional abuse and it serves the needs of the careless parent. About adoption ~ I think rejection hurts the same as far as the depth of it goes because it is our very being that is rejected. I have read stories of how adoptive parents wanted children SO bad they would do anything and they were SO grateful to the birth mom for enabling the adoptive parents to have children and yet in many cases, these adopted children are abused! It doesn’t make sense but what abuse ever does?
      Thanks for sharing! (great to “see” you!)
      Hugs, Darlene

  6. By: Light Posted: 4th May 2015

    How are people dealing with Mother’s Day this year? Card? NC? or….?

    I was thinking of sending a note or card saying that I am sorry to say that I can’t comfortably be with her for Mother’s Day this year. Not sure how to sign it, or whether to actually wish her a happy MD.

  7. By: InSpirit Posted: 4th May 2015

    After reading your article on Mother’s Day, I felt it would help to respond to some insights about another impending, or what feels like, obligatory holiday. I could also say that I feel less terminally confused and unique. I also accidentally found this site and it has helped me come to terms with some of the many triggers from my past that still affect my present.
    For example, I made the decison years ago to not be a mother. I now find that I did not dodge any bullets or change the trajectory of my life. In my twenties, I held the belief that i could create a much better life for myself (again, not like a single mother on welfare,) and not hurt another child with my own unresolved issues (again, not like mother.) In fact, it felt more like I was the mother and I may have taken on the parent role as opposed to being a child when I was supposed to be a child. There were always other more pressing issues like dealing with poverty and or alchoholism and an absentee father. My mother may have thought that she made herself my world. Yet she abandoned me as a child on numerous occasions to situations of which were beyond my control. How different things are now. My father passed away five years ago and lo and behold, my mother became needier than ever. Instead of being there for me she became angry and bitter about how he was never there for her. Again, the sounding board did not work both ways. Hence, the dire need for boundaries which I have never been able to enforce without some kind of threat from her end.
    I will be turning fifty this summer and I could end up feeling completely ripped off (now that victim mentality!) Yet, when I reflect on my past (especially my early twenties,) I can poignantly see how my need for people pleasing completely preempted the reality and need to prepare to live life on life’s terms. In an attempt to rebel (to be nothing at all like my mother was,) I became just like her. Or at least that is what it feels like. Not having a child or life of my own, yet remaining a sounding board into perpetuity just adds insult to injury.
    I have made myself as useless to her as I possibly can be aside from just saying something like, “Would you rather be alone and completely cut off from me? Is that what you want? Because I for one cannot take it anymore.” Like I said about being useless: I am either underemployed, or not employed at all so I have ‘nothing to give.’ I find that I end up using other people as buffers as I was used as a pawn in her relationships in the past. I am an only child, so I am ‘it’ so to speak. I have never felt safe enough to discuss any of these matters outside of the long term relationship that I am in, even with extended family as she made them into the enemy camp many years ago. It was soul crushing to have to go through every single Christmas with her crying about ‘not having a family’ since her family of origin had moved away (her own abandonment issues.) Basically, that made me feel like my presence counted for nothing. I just did not realize it at the time. Now that I am an adult I know that I have choices. I can choose how I respond to people, places and things. It has taken courage to change and time to heal. I try to keep it simple, but more often than not, easier said than done. With awareness comes some acceptance and then perhaps change? It is a painfully slow process.

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 5th May 2015

      Hi K and InSpirit
      Welcome to Emerging from Broken.
      InSpirit ~ you said a mouthful when you said “the sounding board didn’t work both ways” and in these dysfunctional relationships it is never a two way street. The good news is that seeing it the way it really is goes miles towards healing!
      Thanks for sharing!
      hugs, Darlene

  8. By: k Posted: 4th May 2015

    Thank you so much-I am so glad I accidentally found this. I grew up with a mom that had mental issues and was a tad abusive and a hoarder-I left her home when I was 13 and saw her a few time and talked occasionally-she is now at the end of her life in the late stages of lung cancer – I am trying to find a way to come to terms with everything from our past and forgive and let go. This article is very helpful- thank you again

  9. By: S1988 Posted: 26th April 2015

    @Darlene

    “Children are NOT any less valuable and it was embracing that truth that has enabled me to disregard all the actions that suggest that I am NOT as important than other people and really know that I am!”

    Thank you for your comforting words. I know that in my head, but emotionally, I’m still trying to sort that out. Again, thanks.

  10. By: S1988 Posted: 24th April 2015

    “It seems like Mothers Day is just around the corner…..again.”

    Oh, thanks for reminding me. And I don’t mean that in a good way. Having to see mother-worshipping propaganda in public when I run errands makes me cringe.

    The last time I (kinda) celebrated Mother’s Day was last year. I didn’t have much of a choice to not celebrate it because I was living with her, and couldn’t afford to move out. During that day, my brother and his family came to visit. He can’t do anything wrong in the family. He berates his wife and sons and believes in strict discipline of children (which he insulted me for contradicting him and has yet to apologize for it. I didn’t speak to him for five years.) I don’t feel sorry for his wife because she just takes it and at times participates in the abuse of my nephews. I noticed that he hasn’t changed and treated me like a criminal when I said that after I move out, I will limit contact with family. Then a few hours after that he said that he still loved me and that one must choose their own paths in life. (Which was strange since he berated me for that earlier.)

    Now that I’m not living with her anymore, I don’t have to worry about putting up with him or feeling forced to celebrate the holiday. I still live in the twin-city area, but no one in my family knows my exact address. My brother will be coming again, but he won’t find me. I just hope he won’t be given my number and bully me into having a relationship with our mother.

    I, too, wish truly loving mothers a happy Mother’s Day. I just find it unfair that offspring seem to rank lower than parents.

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 26th April 2015

      S1988
      About your last sentence; offspring seem to rank lower than parents “to the parents”.. but that doesn’t make it true! Children are NOT any less valuable and it was embracing that truth that has enabled me to disregard all the actions that suggest that I am NOT as important than other people and really know that I am!
      hugs, Darlene

  11. By: Kylie Posted: 24th April 2015

    Hi everyone!

    It seems like Mothers Day is just around the corner…..again.
    Like other holidays, this would have to be my worst. I cant ever really remember giving a card to my mother for Mothers Day. I may have. To me, l’d feel like awkward as though l was a hypocrite. It was only 2 years ago when my sister (GC) text me and told me to ring our mother for Mothers Day. To which l replied ‘Go **** yourself’. How dare she command me to ring our mother, of whom lve been NC with for years, just so she could feel good that she got me to call. Just unbelievable!!
    Im not playing any part in pretending everything is okay, when clearly our family has been dyfunctional for many years and l am the SG, the black sheep, whatever you want to call it, but l WILL NOT play anymore pretending to be happy families. I knew something was wrong way back in my teens. I didnt know what you called it back then, but lm well aware now. All l knew was l was the problem and whenever l tried to speak out to others, l got told l was a liar?? For speaking out about our Catholic, loving family? Im not real sure how to stop feeling guilty, or how to change my belief systems, as they are firmly entrenched. NC has helped but its cost me in other ways. My relatives would have all heard my mothers side of the story without hearing mine as l left and moved to the other side of the country. I like living where lm not known, where l didnt grow up so others cant get a negative impression of me based on my mother/sister/family.
    To all the mothers on here, l wish you a happy mothers day and hope its not a day filled with shame, regret or remorse. You may be nothing to someone, but to others, you are their world.. Never forget that!

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 26th April 2015

      Hi Kylie!
      Nice to hear from you again! The think I found about people not hearing my side is that they never wanted to! If they did, they would have asked me instead of just listening to everyone else. I stopped feeling guilty when I really understood the truth most of which was (in a nutshell) that I NEVER deserved the way I had been treated.
      Hugs, Darlene

  12. By: Mulki Posted: 23rd April 2015

    Hi!

    What a great post, it really hits home! I am very proud to say that i am my own father. I love me and i am taking care of myself the best way i can. My NF dropped me easily when i decided to go no-contact! My life is sooo good without him, he is evil anyway. We are three siblings between the age 21-24 and we have pretty much no contact. NF made sure of this. Growing up everyone had their own stuff and we were never allowed to share. At the same time he talked behind everyones back, so that we would dislike eachother even more. Our mom is amazing though, thank God! Pages like yours is exactly what those of us who have been through horrible things need. Not every parent is actually a parent! HUGS and LOVE all the way from Europe, Sweden! ??

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 26th April 2015

      Hi Mulki!
      Great to have you here and welcome to EFB!
      Thanks for sharing,
      hugs, Darlene

  13. By: Tracy Posted: 23rd April 2015

    Father’s Day for me.

  14. By: marquis (female) Posted: 15th December 2014

    “I guess that’s evidence that society is more biased towards progenitors than offspring. Sad.”

    Agreed.

  15. By: S1988 Posted: 12th December 2014

    Has anyone noticed that there’s no son’s or daughter’s day? Even in Japan, where elder worship is stronger than in Western countries, there’s a Children’s Day.

    I guess that’s evidence that society is more biased towards progenitors than offspring. Sad.

  16. By: Agi S Posted: 8th December 2014

    I thought I was alone with my dilemma on Mother’s Day and her Birthdays. It’s comforting to know that I don’t have to feel guilty for my feelings about my mother. It’s just pretty sad that I have to say: I don’t have any relationship with my mother.

  17. By: Emily H Posted: 14th November 2014

    I hate my mother. I hate mothers day. I have always gotten her a card at the very least. I usually get something with a nice picture on it, though and says Happy Mothers Day and nothing else.

  18. By: Samantha Posted: 16th September 2014

    thanks for your website .Ive been feeling angry at my mom all day without really knowing why I so angry. An some of your things you’ve written in here gave me the emotions an reason why im feeling them. I guess its because im an adult an I felt ashamed I still want an need attention an affection from a mom that was never good at it but ive always longed for it. Five years ago she adopted two babies an her life has been pretty much about them an their needs, I cant even have a normal discussion with her without her interrupting me to point out something cute they do or something,she also does this when im need of advice for things that I feel important. She wants me to help her but I receive nothing in return,an im left heartbroken an lost ,hurt an angry. So thanks for this website its good to know im not alone in feeling this way.

    • By: Darlene Ouimet Posted: 16th September 2014

      Hi Samantha
      Great to have you here and I am glad that you found some clarity. We all want to be cherished by our mothers, there is nothing wrong with that. When we are taught to try harder all the time it makes that craving worse. You will find so much info here
      hugs, Darlene

  19. By: Vicki Posted: 12th July 2014

    My mom didn’t get ANY Mother’s Day cards – AND she had the nerve to be totally offended, eternally affronted as well as managing to turn every single person in the family angry at me for being “such an unforgiving person to her, who was only a victim her entire life.”
    Which wasn’t untrue, but not by me. No child under 5 is going to be able to physically abuse a woman in her 30’s. Her husband did it, so maybe I AM unforgiving. An unforgiving person with a traumatic tumor in my head that the moment it breaks will 97 times out of 100 will die. And the other 3 times will go into a major stroke and be a vegetable. Unless medical science comes up with something in the interim.
    Since only 1 percent of the entire world ever gets what I have, I’m doubting the advance of medical science coming through in my lifetime.

  20. By: Gee Posted: 11th July 2014

    Wonderful!!! Reading this filled my heart with hope:)
    I struggled with this X4 for a few years lol. My Gramma got the heartwarming, loving card, my stepmom and real mom got simple, “enjoy your day” cards, and a wonderful woman who helped turn my life around got one like my Gramma.

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