You Reap What You Sow ~ What about Child Abuse

Did I sow the seeds of deserving abuse? Did I do something to bring that on myself? Was I sexually abused because I had “sown bad seed?” Was I neglected because I had not sown the right seeds? I believed that I deserved the strap that I endured many times; I was told that I deserved it. I was literally brainwashed to accept that I had brought all abuse on myself. And I certainly believed that I did. You reap what you sow.

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Evil Manipulative People and Emotional Damage

I had to learn to stop trying to understand evil manipulative people in favour of understanding what happened to me. It seemed easier to concentrate on the WHY questions about them, but I had to realize and acknowledge the damage and how it manifested in my belief system, so that I could overcome it. I had to do the opposite of what those pathetic adults did to me. I had to learn to consider myself.

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Take the Good with the Bad or the Bad with the Good?

Why shouldn’t I share my recovery with the world? Why should I protect “their” reputations? Why is it wrong to talk about MY childhood and MY life? All my life I had been told to focus on the good things and forget the bad things. But the bad things seemed to rule my life, hiding in the dark under the surface of what appeared to be fine! The bad things didn’t leave me alone!

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